And Why It’s Okay to Do Things Differently Today

^{Image Canva}

Planning a wedding can feel like juggling blessings, budgets, and beautiful ideas all at once. Many Latter-day Saint couples wonder, “Who’s supposed to pay for what?” It’s a fair question—and while traditions once had neat little lists, today’s weddings look a bit different. In modern LDS wedding planning, every couple and every family handles finances a little their own way. The key is to work together in faith, love, and unity, so everyone feels included—and no one feels overburdened.

Still, it’s helpful to see what the “old school” version looked like, just for reference. Below is a traditional breakdown of wedding expenses that families used to follow, followed by some thoughts about how today’s couples often adjust things to fit their own circumstances and stewardship.

Traditional Guidelines (Old-School Reference)

Bride and/or Bride’s Family

• Engagement party

• Wedding consultant’s fee (if used)

• Bridal gown, veil, and accessories

• Invitations, announcements, and postage

• Wedding gift for the groom

• Bridesmaids’ bouquets and luncheon

• Pre-wedding parties hosted by bridesmaids

• Photographer and videographer

• Flowers, music, and decorations for the ceremony and reception

• Total cost of the reception (including food, cake, and beverages)

• Transportation for the bridal party to and from the ceremony

• Bride’s medical exam and blood test (in the old days!)

• Any personal attire or travel expenses for the bride

Groom and/or Groom’s Family

• Groom’s attire and travel expenses

• Rehearsal dinner

• Bride’s wedding ring

• Gifts for groomsmen and attendants

• Marriage license and officiant’s fee

• Bride’s bouquet and going-away corsage

• Mothers’ and grandmothers’ corsages

• All boutonnieres

• Honeymoon expenses

Attendants

• Own attire (except flowers provided by the couple)

• Travel expenses

• Bridal shower paid for by maid of honor and bridesmaids

• Bachelor party paid for by best man and ushers

A Modern LDS Reality Check

While it’s interesting to see how things were once divided, most couples today find that this list doesn’t quite fit real life anymore. Many brides and grooms now cover much of the cost themselves—especially if they’re already established, have savings, or want to keep things simple.

Parents often still love to contribute where they can, but it’s less about obligation and more about offering a gift of love. Sometimes a family might cover the flowers or the luncheon; other times, they may help with the dress or photography. There’s no “right” way—only the way that feels right for your family.

And if you’re blending family resources, communication is everything. A calm, prayerful conversation early on—focused on gratitude and fairness—can keep hearts united and expectations clear.

Peace, Purpose, and Partnership

In the end, who pays for what matters far less than how you work together while planning your temple sealing and celebration. When handled with kindness and transparency, wedding budgeting becomes a spiritual exercise in stewardship and harmony—just as sacred as choosing your colors or flowers.

So whether your parents are helping, you’re footing most of the bill, or everyone’s pitching in a little, remember this: your wedding isn’t about who paid for what. It’s about two people choosing eternal love, surrounded by family, faith, and joy.