What to Say, When to Speak, and What to Avoid

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When it comes to wedding toasts, most people don’t worry about what to say…

They worry about whether they’re saying the right thing.

And in an LDS wedding reception, that question matters even more—because the tone is a little different than what you might see in movies or at other weddings.

The good news?

LDS wedding toasting etiquette is actually simple, respectful, and beautifully centered on what matters most: love, family, and faith.

Let’s walk through everything you need to know so you can feel confident—whether you’re giving a toast or planning the lineup for your reception.

Wedding Speech vs. Wedding Toast (Quick Refresher)

When someone asks you to “give a toast,” they usually mean:

A short speech plus a toast at the end

Here’s how that breaks down:

• Speech (3–5 minutes):
  A few stories, thoughts, or reflections about the couple
• Toast (30 seconds or less):
  A brief expression of well wishes, ending with a cue for guests to raise their glasses

Together, they create a complete and meaningful moment.

Traditional Toasting Order

While LDS receptions are flexible and family-centered, there is a traditional order that many follow.

Typically, the host of the reception—often the bride’s father—begins.

From there, the order usually looks like this:

1. Parent(s) of the bride
2. Parent(s) of the groom
3. Maid of honor
4. Best man
5. Groom
6. Bride

That said, this isn’t a strict rule.

You can simplify, shorten, or rearrange based on your reception style and timing.

Choosing the Right Tone

One of the most important parts of LDS toasting etiquette is tone.

Before writing your speech, ask yourself:

What would feel most like “them”?

• If the couple is playful and outgoing → light humor can be lovely
• If they are more reserved or spiritual → a heartfelt, sincere tone will feel more appropriate

There’s no one-size-fits-all approach—just match the tone to the couple.

What’s Appropriate (and What to Avoid)

This is where LDS wedding toasts are a little different—and where a little guidance goes a long way.

Appropriate:

• Kind, uplifting humor
• Personal stories that reflect character and love
• Faith-centered thoughts or scriptures (if it feels natural)
• Expressions of gratitude to parents and family
• Encouragement for the couple’s future

Best to Avoid:

• Mentioning past relationships
• Embarrassing or overly personal stories
• Jokes about divorce or infidelity
• Anything that could make the couple uncomfortable
• Alcohol-related humor or references

Even though the reception is more relaxed than the ceremony, it’s still a sacred celebration of an eternal marriage.

Keeping that in mind helps everything feel aligned and respectful.

A Note About LDS Receptions

If you’re not familiar with LDS weddings, one small but important detail:

Toasts are non-alcoholic.

Guests may raise glasses of water, punch, or another beverage—but the focus is on the words, not the drink.

And honestly?

That often makes the moment feel even more sincere.

A Simple Guideline to Remember

If you’re ever unsure what to say, come back to this:

• Be kind.
• Be respectful.
• Be sincere.

That’s it.

You don’t need to impress anyone.
You don’t need to be the funniest person in the room.

You just need to honor the couple in a way that feels genuine.

Final Thought

A well-given toast doesn’t just fill time in a reception…

It becomes one of the moments people remember most.

So whether you’re speaking—or helping others prepare—keep it simple, heartfelt, and focused on love.

Because that’s what truly makes a toast feel beautiful.